Archive for April, 2011

Royal Wedding

April 29, 2011

Of course I got up at the crack of dawn to watch the royal wedding. I’m a girl, I love this stuff. A king marries a princess and I watch in my pj’s, on the sofa in the wee hours of the morning. I call to the husband and ask if he plans to join my private celebration on the couch? “Hell no, your crazy”. Your loss” I yell back as I sink lower beneath my blanket, sip my cup of tea and adjust my tiara.

Did I mention that myself and some friends actually got to met the royal couple? Here we are giving our best Queen Elizabeth wave.

P.S Happy Birthday Dad. I know William and Kate have hijacked your day, but I still remembered.

Organized Rookie

April 26, 2011

Sometimes my disorganization annoys me. Well, it always annoys me and I’m guilty of making declarations to turn over new more organized leaves, on the daily and Sunday night I even went so far as to act on it. Not wanting to start my week off hopping around the bedroom, illuminated purely by the light from the bathroom (so as not to wake the sleeping Husband) I work on my ability to balance as I simultaneously brushing my teeth, while trying to button up my dress and put a stiletto on my right foot. Sometimes I can even pull it off, but more times there’s a lot of bumping, tripping, falling and plenty of swearing. And that husband I try so hard not to wake, guess what? Now he’s awake and insists he heard thunder.

Anyway, Sunday I decided to shake up my Monday morning ritual of chaos by preselecting my outfit for the day, along with shoes and accessories. Everything was ironed and hung in manner that screamed “I am so organized”. I then located my wallet and keys, very important, these 2 items in particular have a big habit of disappearing just as I’m about to race out the door, and placed them in my purse. I then climbed into bed all smug and proud, set my alarm to go off 15 minutes later than usual because of my mad organization skills and popped off to sleep with a smile on my face. Next morning all hell broke loose when it was discovered that the chosen outfit, made me look compressed and wide. No joke. It took a good 3 inches off my height and somehow added them to my waist, hips, thighs and ass. It was a mess. And now here I was, back to square 1 with the clock ticking, the stress levels through the roof, bumping, tripping, falling and swearing as I scrambled around for a plan B. Why didn’t I try it on the night before? Such a rookie mistake and one I was forced to learn the only way I know, that hard way.

Random photo to go along with my random post, but this is what I imagine goes on in my house once I finally leave in the morning. The Husband and some of the furry kids break into a “Ding-Dong the witch is dead” type celebration dance. So cute.

Happy Easter

April 24, 2011

This Easter I plan to hit up all the local Easter Egg hunts. Kids aged 2-8 look out, your biggest competition this year will be me, a grown ass women in her 30’s with an addiction to chocolate and a very big competitive streak. And I will play dirty if I have too. So bring your A-Game kids and I’ll see y’all at the hunt.


Will Power Of A Gnat

April 22, 2011

I gave myself a mental pep-talk going in. “Stick to the plan. Go straight to cleaning products. Don’t look left or right. Tunnel vision all the way. Get what you need and get out, fast”. But I blew it in the first 60 second. Target just has that power over me and from what I hear, pretty much everyone else too. I went in for a couple of items, some essentials for cleaning the house, but 1 bikini, 1 shirt, 3 cami’s, 2 necklaces (they were on sale) and a bunch of new hair accessories (also on sale) later, I left with a cart full of items that became essentials once I clapped eye on them. Yes, I’m weak. The will power of a gnat, but a gnat who is rocking some fancy new hair pieces. Control your envy people, this is after all a religious weekend.

Feeling Not Smart

April 21, 2011

I’m reading a book that’s well beyond my intellectual capacity. I don’t like it, its making me feel not smart. The combination of big words and long winded sentences on subjects I know nothing about are playing havoc with my ADD, not to mention my innate ability to become overwhelmed. As I read I can’t even keep the story straight in my head, my brain is slamming doors, “too hard, too hard” it screams and as a means of preserving sanity, not to mention much needed brain cells, it kicks my thinking back to areas of safety, to topics that actually do make sense, like the upcoming royal wedding or where to hit up the best Easter Egg hunts this weekend. Yes, each and every time I try to read another page, my head wanders, I can’t relate. Its a losing battle. But I hate to quit, yet I’m not having fun. Its suppose to be fun. But I feel like I’m back in school about to be humiliated and exposed for not understanding the assigned reading material. I can’t quit. I need to focus and push on, I might learn something, a new word, a different perspective, something. Or I may just have my ego crushed, reinforcing the fact that I’m really not that very smart.